- Russian Motorcycles.
- These motorcycles aren’t great - they’re cheap.
You have to love messing around with engines to enjoy owning one.
The clients problem?
He couldn’t persuade dealers to stock them. And he was a year away from calling it quits because he was haemorrhaging money. It seems nobody wants a big piece of machinery that will carry them at 100 mph up a dual carriage way to be a bargain. Who knew?
Our problem was a tiny budget (we were his last resort).
Our solution was to imbue the Uralmoto range with a personality derived from its WWII heritage and appeal to bike enthusiasts by running these ads in specialist biker magazines. After all, this was a product for an authentic biker — someone with oil beneath his fingernails.
The ads should look cheap — they should look like they came from the manual — and they should appear to have absolutely no sophistication in the design.
After the campaign ran our client no longer had to cold-call dealers, they were calling him.
Legible copy is below each ad.
The Hitler–Stalin pact was a marriage of convenience that ended with war between Mother Russia and the Fatherland. Born and bred in battle, the Roustabout served with distinction. And now after some minor improvements (like electronic start) the Roustabout is again ready and willing to take you across Europe in any weather and over any terrain. But comrade, things aren’t what they used to be — these days you need a passport.
The Roustabout £4425 on the road, any road.
- NASA spent a decade and $12 billion developing a pen that worked in zero gravity.
The Russians used a pencil.
What’s the point in frivolous extras? They’re as useful as an ashtray on a bike. But hey, you do get an electronic start. Are we Russians going soft? Nyet, get real.
The Siberian Wolf. £3895 on the road.
- To make it more appealing to the ladies, we removed the machine gun mount.
We Russians don’t make a fuss about the extras you get. We ditched 7000 rounds of armour piercing ammunition (along with the gun) to give you extra speed. If you really want them back, you’ll have to join the Russian army. Don’t be so fussy though, you can still take a ride through any country. The Roustabout, £4425 on the road, as well as off.
- When you have Joe Stalin looking over your shoulder, you make sure
you produce a bloody reliable motorbike.
In 1941 Uncle Joe requested that we build a bike with just one design specification. Total victory. We produced a bike that could take anything a heavily armoured Panzer division could throw at it. Today, we even reckon it could take on anything the British weather could throw at it. Brave words you might say, but tovarich once you’ve tried it, you’ll want to take on anything. The Roustabout £4425 on the road.
- Vorsprung durch technik [ as they never said in Stalingrad ]
Developed in 1941. Early competition against Hitler’s army group central. Victory.
So much for the history lesson, what about the future?
After a few improvements (electric start for one), ready and willing to do battle.
Have fun comrade.
The Dalesman, £4,625 on the autobahn.