Dani could feel all of the grit and annoyance of the past few days wash away as she let herself into her apartment. Finally! She was only moments away from sinking into her favorite chair and logging some serious game time. She couldn’t believe she was still wide awake after spending the last couple of days camping out for the new “DeathCraft” expansion set. Camping out for new games wasn’t a normal thing for Dani. This was actually the first time she’d ever done it. Usually she just pre-ordered and picked up new expansions, or downloaded them. But this release was different. In addition to not allowing pre-orders this time, the creators were giving a special mount to the first 50 people in line at each game store. This was a one-time only shot to get a non-transferable mount that allowed you to port from one region to another without the need of any kind of calling stone or special character ability; that was a treasure worth camping out for! But there was an additional incentive to camp out as well. A limited number of the games were going to be available to each store, the number varied based on gross sales of the store, but once they were sold out, you would have to wait at least 2 weeks for the second wave of games to hit the shelves. That meant you could be two weeks behind the rest of the world, not to mention your friends, in growing your characters. Not acceptable. There was also talk that features available in the first wave would no longer be offered by the second wave, but this had not been confirmed. Despite being rumor, there was no point risking it. Dani did not want to be lacking features that her competitors had available. So that’s how Dani ended up spending her last two vacation days this year, sitting on the hard sidewalk, outside of the Game Depot. The truth was, that camping out for something, anything really, was a secret bucket list item of Dani’s. She had nicknamed it “urban camping” when selling her friends on joining her and she had sold it as a really cool adventure. The reality of spending 48 hours, on a sidewalk, in front of a gaming store with 50 other unbathed, overtired, and hyper-anxious nerds while having a 15 min maximum to run to a port-a-potty and freshen up every three hours, was not the image she had painted, for her friends, or for herself.

The doors opened at midnight but it took close to an hour for Dani and her friends to pay for and receive their copies of the game. She was home before 2 am, but she was looking at hours of downloads and updates before the game would actually be playable. The good news was that most people were asleep or out partying right now so her download speed was in its peak time. She started the first download going and went to take a shower. As she washed the street essence off of her, she acknowledged that she was still happy she had taken the adventure. At least now she could check it off her bucket list and say she had done it, even if she never wanted do it again; and she had an exclusive first copy with special mount. She had definitely made the right decision. She had been soaking in the steamy shower for close to an hour when a timer went off letting her know the first patch was likely done. Dani grabbed a towel and wrapped it around herself, quickly dabbing herself dry before twisting it at the top and tucking it in to stay in place.

Sure enough when Dani got to her computer there was a popup box on the screen advising the patch was complete. Dani clicked on ‘Continue’ and a Terms of Service Agreement popped up. It was one of those that will not allow you to click on ‘Continue’ until you have scrolled to the bottom of the agreement, thereby suggesting that you had indeed read the entire agreement. Dani used her mouse to grab the little button on the right-hand scroll bar. As quickly as the program would allow, she rolled the screen down past pages of legal notices, descriptions and definitions. As she watched all the words fly by, almost in a blur, Dani wondered if anyone in the history of ever had actually sat and read all that crap; especially before jumping into a highly anticipated new game. The screen reached the bottom of the agreement and the ‘Continue’ button lit up. Dani clicked on it and the Agreement went away and was replaced by a new ‘Download’ box. Dani’s eyes quickly skimmed the explanation at the top of the box and then clicked ‘Download now’ to start the next patch. A long bar appeared at the bottom of the screen and started to fill up. The indicator below the bar predicted it would be 1 hour and 45 minutes to complete the download. The initial time predictions were never accurate (“Thank God!” Dani thought) because Dani kept much faster computers and Internet Speeds than the average consumer. Dani set her timer for 45 minutes and went to the kitchen to make something to eat. 

 Dani loved to cook and was a self-proclaimed “foodie” so the crackers, meat sticks and potato chips she had lived on the last 2 days were not her favorite part of the adventure. Dani grabbed a frying pan and turned on the stove. She dabbed a little of her favorite olive oil on her fingertip and rubbed it into her chapped lips before pouring a little into the pan to heat up. The phone rang. She didn’t even have to look at the screen to know it was Deb calling. Deb would want to talk while waiting on the downloads to finish. Dani picked up the phone and clicked the green answer button. She could already hear Deb crunching on her bowl of cereal before she could say, “Hello.” Deb was a cereal junkie! She especially seemed to like eating it while she was talking on the phone. It took Dani close to a year to get used to listen to the constant crunching during phone conversations. Early on Dani considered ending the friendship over the annoyance; now she barely noticed it. *Crunch *Crunch, “What are you cooking?” *Crunch *Crunch came out of the receiver. “What makes you so sure I’m cooking?” Dani asked. *Crunch, “You’ve already been home over an hour and you haven’t cooked in days. Hmmmm…” Deb pretended to ponder the equation. “Ok smartass. How’s the Capt. Crunch?” Dani threw back. “Touché,” Deb said with a low whistle, “So what character are you going to make first?” Dani cradled the phone against her shoulders so she could slice vegetables while they talked about their builds.

~~~~~~~~~

It took most of the night to finish the downloads, by the time she clicked ‘Continue’ on the last patch, it was time to start getting ready for work. Dani had almost called in sick to work when she walked into the living room dressed to leave and saw the green bar at 100% and the “PLAY” button, lit up. She cursed herself for not having more than the two vacation days she needed for her “urban camping” event left. But today was Friday, and she would have all weekend to play, so she forced herself out the door and bought herself a donut at the corner market to congratulate herself for adulting like a rock star. The adulting stopped at the doorway to her office though. She daydreamed a good portion of her day and spent only slightly less time online searching the forums to see what reviews and hacks were already popping up. She also spent a little time talking to Deb and Glenn via text about their audio strategy for tonight’s run. There was discussion of using laptops so they could game from the same room, but the chance of lag on a laptop was too dismal a proposition to risk, especially on Release day! So they settled on using “Vent” which had been pretty reliable in the past. By the end of the day Dani had only really worked on one client’s file, she had decided to bring her backlog home. By Sunday afternoon she would be ready, or at least able, to unplug from the game for a while and focus on catching up her files. So at about a quarter to five, she had grabbed the large stack of files off the corner of her desk, shoved them in her oversized briefcase, grabbed her purse and her coffee mug and headed for the elevators. She had already stocked the kitchen with snacks and her favorite drinks, so nothing but Friday traffic stood between her and “DeathCraft” now.

When she edged the car out of the parking lot and onto Main Street that evening, she had already started building the fifth version of her Dark Elf in her mind, but now, even the drive was behind her. It was game time! She had earned it. It was going to be an all gaming, all-the-time, kind of weekend. She dropped the keys on the entryway table as she passed it and stopped dead at the opening to the living room. She dropped her coffee mug and the mail as she jumped back and screamed in alarm. The man sitting in her favorite gaming chair didn’t flinch and didn’t try to quiet her. He just sat there looking at her with his eyebrows arched until some form of curiosity made her stop screaming. “You can keep doing that if you like, but sooner or later your neighbors will start to respond and you will have some explaining to do won’t you?” the man said in a slightly judgey tone. Dani was startled from her fear by instant anger, “I’LL have explaining to do?” she questioned. “Yes.” The man said matter-of-factly. “How would you explain my presence?” he asked like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Dani made a noise somewhere between a laugh and a choke, “Umm … I guess I’d introduce you as my intruder and ask someone to shove a foot up your ass?!? Or worse!” Dani said incredulously. The man laughed. I don’t think you’d be successful. You invited me here, and I have the paperwork to prove it. You would come off quite foolish if you tried to act like I was an intruder at this point,” the man explained. Dani just stared at the man for a moment. Her brain was moving in several different directions and she was not sure how to continue this conversation. For a moment she considered that she was hallucinating from lack of proper sleep and nutrition or that she had wrecked her car on the way home and was caught in a coma dream-state. But everything looked and felt very real. She could even smell the chuck roast she had put in the crock pot before leaving for work this morning stewing in its juices. “Do you smell in comas?” she wondered. “No.” the man said. Dani looked at the man, eyes wide, “No, what?” Dani asked. “No you do not smell in comas. Well at least you don’t smell your roast at home from your hospital room.” The man explained calmly. Dani took a step back, “Did I ask that out loud?” Dani wondered, out loud. “No.” the man replied again. Dani felt a little dizzy. “Well don’t be stupid, sit down before you faint and crack your skull open” Dani looked at the man confused. She heard herself ask in a weak voice, “AM I going to faint?” as the room started to spin and the floor came flying up at her face.

When Dani came to, she was stretched out on her couch with a light blanket over her and one of her neck pillows under her head. As her eyes focused, she saw her favorite mug sitting on the table with steam gently rising out of it. She could smell the herbs and spices of her favorite Chai tea. She loved that smell. She breathed it in deeply. She couldn’t remember laying down when she got home, but apparently she had really needed the sleep so … Dani’s eyes shifted back to the steam. “If I put myself to bed, why is that tea still steaming?” she thought. She tried to sit up and turn at the same time, scanning the room for the man. “You needn’t panic. I’m right here,” the man said from an armchair opposite the couch, an amused smile on his face. Dani sat up and scurried to the farthest end of the couch and kept her feet under her ready to spring at him. He chuckled, “My, aren’t we primal dear? Relax, drink your tea,” he ordered gently. Dani instantly felt compelled to do as he said and she reached for her tea and then settled into the corner of the couch in a more comfortable position. She sipped on her tea and actually felt more relaxed. She looked up at the man and said, “Who are you?” The man smiled, “There now. When we are calm we ask the smart questions.” He gave her a mock tip of his cap, but he wasn’t wearing a cap. Then he continued, “I am Satan.” He said simply, “But you already knew that. What is your real question?” Dani never broke eye contact with him, “Why are you here?” The man smiled and leaned back in his chair, “To discuss our business arrangement of course.” He folded one leg over the other and leaned forward, clearly excited. Dani realized she should be feeling a great amount of alarm at this point, but she couldn’t. She remained entirely calm as she asked him, “What business arrangement is that again?” The man pulled a file from a briefcase that Dani didn’t remember seeing until now. As soon as the man opened the file and nodded, the briefcase disappeared. Dani stared at the space where the briefcase once was and willed her mind to be alarmed. The man pulled several sheets of paper, stapled together, from the file and leaned forward to hand them to her. Dani took the papers from him noting that they still felt warm from the printer. She looked down at the papers in her hand and saw the large bold words at the top of the page, “Terms of Service”. Dani flipped to the last page and stared, without blinking, at her signature at the bottom of the page. She turned back to the first page and began skimming each paragraph. She didn’t need to look hard because on the 3rd page, halfway down the page, one paragraph was bold and highlighted. Tears welled up in her eyes as she absorbed the words in that paragraph.

Dani’s water-filled eyes moved from the words, now swimming on the page, to the man in her chair. “You don’t look like I would have imagined Satan,” she said softly in a creepily conversational tone. And he didn’t. He was young, not much older than her if any. He had a casual sort of surfer vibe to him, with an air of confidence and a suntan! He wore lightly distressed jeans with flip flops and a button down shirt, the top three buttons loosed. He was not hard to look at in any way and certainly had no horns or hooves that she could see. “I actually look EXACTLY as you would imagine me. I only appear as people imagine me. If you answered the door and your neighbor peered in, they might very well SEE that red demon with the horns and the hooves,” he answered the question she had not spoken. “The form I take is not as relevant as the souls I take,” he smirked at her knowingly and gave her a wink. Her skin crawled, and yet she could not feel alarmed. “What do you want from me?” a tear slipped free, from the puddle hovering at the edge of her eye, and slid down her cheek. “Don’t be alarmed Dani,” he said smoothly. Dani’s mind reeled at the irony of that statement and something in his eye said he was pleased that she had picked up on it. “I don’t ask anything of people that they don’t truly enjoy deep down. What I want from you is nothing more than you have been panting for all day. I want you to play.” He looked at her as if he had handed her a gift and was waiting for a squeal of delight and a hug. Dani asked cautiously, “Play what?” The man looked at her questioningly, “The game of course.” He let out a hearty laugh like adults always do when a child asks something silly. Dani thought about how to ask for clarification. “That doesn’t make sense. I was already going to play the game, so if that is all you wanted, I could be playing already?” Dani questioned. The man smiled. “What a great piece I got in you. I am SO excited you are mine. You will play well, I can tell.” The man had a slightly mischievous glow in his eye as he contemplated her future services to him. “My dear, I don’t intend to waste your talents sitting in this living room. You will play for real! You will BE one of my NPCs in the new expansion. The rest of your days will be spent in the world you love the most! Aren’t you excited?” The man beamed. Dani slowly processed his words, and finally, she felt alarm start to well up in her chest, enough that her chest might burst; her mind raced and she spun to ask the question. Before her lips could part she saw the man fling his arm open and across like he was presenting something and suddenly her entire world started to spin. The living room faded from view and a forest of trees swam into view. She hit the ground hard and caught her breath for a moment. Then she noticed the color and texture of her skin. She looked like a cartoon. Everything around her looked CGI’d. Her skin had a grayish hue and when she felt her ears, they were long and elven. She shakily got to her feet and quickly realized that she was significantly taller than she was used to. Looking at the ground almost made her dizzy. She was getting used to her new legs and trying to get a look at her body when she heard something behind her. She spun to see a Punky Brewster version of a Goblin and the goriest of Undead Hunters running toward her. They were cartoon characters, the same as her, but she would recognize Deb and Glenn’s toons anywhere.