Hiatus
People has a need for support, for a partner who is understanding and accepting towards the other. In spite of that, this need, this desire can be overwritten if the given person is happy and has a fulfilling life. But I still think life cannot be complete without a partner. At least not for me.
I am happy and can cope with my life, yet I sometimes think about how it would be if I weren’t alone. I have no relationship now, but I am sure only a self-defense mechanism, which is unconscious, keeps me from having it so. The decision is made consciously, but it’s reason is undeciphered. I channel my energy and time towards something I want to be good at and in this way I keep myself from being threatened (by my own fears) and vulnerable. Unfortunately, I cannot enjoy the feeling of being with someone.
My aim is to discover what suffers a shortage in me, how do I feel I’m alone, yet I’m trying to fill this gap, but it can never be done completely. This way I’m trying to solve the problem in myself. My pictures feed from the past just as much as from the desire I have in me for a woman, who has no face in my head, but has a personality (but is not a person), who’s motions and features I can draw up. This desire and the hiatus, shown in the still lifes encompass my series.
I am happy and can cope with my life, yet I sometimes think about how it would be if I weren’t alone. I have no relationship now, but I am sure only a self-defense mechanism, which is unconscious, keeps me from having it so. The decision is made consciously, but it’s reason is undeciphered. I channel my energy and time towards something I want to be good at and in this way I keep myself from being threatened (by my own fears) and vulnerable. Unfortunately, I cannot enjoy the feeling of being with someone.
My aim is to discover what suffers a shortage in me, how do I feel I’m alone, yet I’m trying to fill this gap, but it can never be done completely. This way I’m trying to solve the problem in myself. My pictures feed from the past just as much as from the desire I have in me for a woman, who has no face in my head, but has a personality (but is not a person), who’s motions and features I can draw up. This desire and the hiatus, shown in the still lifes encompass my series.
2014
