It's been a long time since I did something not work-related.

And it's been a long time since I wanted to finish this piece in particular.

For the past couple of years (years, wow) I have been feeling extremely down, to say the least. Things have looked quite grim since 2019, which affected many of us in many ways.

First the isolation, then the loneliness, and then the constant fear.

The loss of loved ones, and the fear for loved ones - shook the very foundations I was stepping on.

It slowly affected my health and the health of my loved ones. Which in turn affected everything else. Work, personal relationships, and mind.

Then slowly isolation turned to the opposite - but online. Connecting digitally. And it became the only way to soothe and distract. Which in turn made things feel even more lonely. Once inside though it became hard to withdraw and every log-in turned into competition, comparison, and more loneliness and confusion.

So 2024 came, five years later, still fighting the fear, still living in it, still in the loop. Probably some of you feel the same. I just wanted to say that you are not the only one who feels like this.

And it's probably time to try to disconnect from it.