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About

About

A project documenting people's reactions to jokes in Ft. Greene Park, Brooklyn.
Published:
Not long ago, I was talking with one of my oldest friends, Blaise Kearsley about a storytelling series she founded and hosts regularly in NYC called “How I Learned” (HowILearnedSeries.com). After nearly five years she has produced dozens of shows celebrating all the important human dilemmas, traumas, incidents, etc. that precede and aid an “education”. For example, some of the series’ events have been titled “How I Learned My Adolecence Was Over" or "How I Learned To Inhale: Stories About Drugs" or, one of my favorites, "How I Learned I Was Right All Along".
 
While the objective may be for storytellers to thoughtfully and intelligently articulate a wide range of human experience that gives rise to a personal epiphany (or sometimes just a rude wake-up call) the result is almost invariably hilarious. This probably has something to do with the fact that the most enlightening moments in life are often a direct result of our own arrogance, anger, lust, (insert deadly sin of choice here) which, as we all know, inevitably leads to humiliation. And really, is there anything funnier than humiliation? No, there is not... especially when said humiliation is not our own. (But really even when it is.)
 
All of which leads us to the project below. I asked Blaise if she had ever, in all these years, produced a show called “How I Learned To Be Funny”? I was surprised by her reply. 
 
Well you certainly should, I said.
I said, why don’t you go try to be funny and then write about it? Better yet, why don’t you go tell people funny jokes in the park and I'll photograph it?
Which is exactly what we did one cloudy but warm afternoon this fall.
 
Here is JOKES IN THE PARK. Some of the jokes are undeniably funny. Some might not be to your taste. Others,  you might find quite distasteful… offensive even. We apologize ahead of time and absolve ourselves of any wrongdoing with the knowledge that sometimes, in life, it really is just a joke...
 
 
M. Sharkey
Ft. Greene Park, Brooklyn
2014
Shadeen
 
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A Lickalotopus.
Cat
 
What’s the difference between being hungry and horny? 
Where you put the cucumber. 
 
 
Andy
 
How do you get a tissue to dance?
Put a little boogie in it.
 
 
Andy

What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts that a 25 year old doesn't?
Her navel. 
 
 
Susan & Kat
 
What did one saggy tit say to the other saggy tit?
If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts! 
 
 
Kale & Zazel (brother and sister)
 
How did Hitler tie his shoes?
In little Nazis!
 
 
Kale & Zazel

What do a plum and an elephant have in common?
They're both purple! 
 
Except for the elephant. :(
 
 
Arthur

Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
Ask your mother! 
 
 
Windsor & Axuan
 
What do you call a gay dinosaur?
Mega-saur-ass.
 
 
Axuan

 
What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?
By the time you’re finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in. 
 
 
Guston
 
A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey! We have a drink named after you!"
The grasshopper says, "Really? You have a drink named Steve?"
 
 
Guston
 
What does one lawyer say to the other lawyer?
Hey! We're both lawyers!
 
 
Guston
 
What did one condom say to the other condom
Let's get shit-faced!
 
 
Marisa
 
Why did God give men penises?
So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up. 
 
 
Salinger
 
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese! 
 
 
Left to right: Windy, Winston, Bedford, Bodhi

What does one tampon say to the other tampon?
Nothing. They're both stuck up cunts.
 
 
Krista & Chris (roommates)
 
How can you tell if your roommate is gay?
His cock tastes like shit.
 
 
Krista & Chris
 
What is the difference between anal sex and a microwave?
A microwave doesn't brown your meat.
 
 
Jee
 
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One cannibal says to the other cannibal
"Does this taste funny to you?"
 
 
Left to right: Bosceaux, Bodhi, Genesis, Evonna

What did one snowman say to the other?
"Do you smell carrots?"
 
 
Left to right: Bosceaux, Bodhi, Genesis, Evonna

What did the blind man say when he passed the fish market?
"Good morning ladies!"
 
 
Ben and his dog, Parsley

Where do you find a one legged dog?
Right where you left him!
 
 
Brothers Nathaniel & Jonas with friend Basil

Do you know where otters come from?
Otter-space!
 
 
Brothers Nathaniel & Jonas with friend Basil

What did one stawberry say to the other strawberry?
"If you weren't so fresh we wouldn't be in this jam right now."
 
 
Brothers Nathaniel & Jonas with friend Basil

What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
 
 
Brothers Nathaniel and Jonas with friend Basil

What kind of bees produce milk?
Boobies.
 
 
Brothers Nathaniel & Jonas with friend Basil

When does a Cub Scout become a Boy Scout?
After he eats his first Brownie.
 
 
Left to right: Phoenix, Tom, Samson and Damiana

What do the Mafia and a pussy have in common?
One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit. 
 
 
Left to right: Samson, Damiana, Phoenix and Tom

How did Alfred Hitchcock hold up his pants?
Suspensters!
 
 
Phoenix
 
A man walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing nothing but bubble wrap...
Psychiatrist says, "I can clearly see your nuts."
 
 
Tay & Dana

What do you call a black guy who flies airplanes?
A pilot, you racists.
 
 
Tay & Dana

What is the leading cause of death in lesbians?
Hairballs. 
 
 
Tay & Dana
 
How do you know when your sister's on the rag?
When your dad's dick tastes funny.
 
 
Tay & Dana
 
Two dyslexic guys walk into a bra...
 
 
Tay & Dana

Have you heard about the new gay sitcom?
It's called "Leave It, It's Beaver."
 
 
Tay & Dana
 
What's the worst thing Willie Nelson could possibly say while giving him a blow job?
"I'm not Willie Nelson"